Today while I was driving from my home town to Bucharest in order to catch my flight back to the mighty North, I noticed some things and I thought of others. (just to answer some people's question, I don't just sit on the sofa waiting for ideas to come, I am busy as hell, yet there are always times when you just sit and think. And when you get your thoughts in the right order, it takes you only 15 minutes to write a post, voila, le magique.) Since I cursed like crazy so many dudes who got a car and a licence, but not a brain, I thought I should make a list of things Romanian people have difficulty in understanding.
1. Roundabouts. I find roundabouts to be the most elegant mean of intersection (except those little annoying extremely crowded ones, like you can find in Piatra-neamt). If I am to drive 350 km like I did today, I need to constantly remember myself not to look only on my left side while entering the round-about, but also the right side, for idiots. So, imagine I am to give my driving licence exam right now and I get the funny hard as hell question - Who has priority in a roundabout? A. Cars who already are in the roundabout - which basically mean they come from your left side. B. Cars coming from the right side. C. Cars who already are in the roundabout plus morons coming from your right side, who will curse you for daring to not stop in the middle of the freaking intersection to let them cross. Even if you are in the middle of the roundabout, you still need to take extra caution. At least if you want to catch the plane. Otherwise, you can just let them bump into you in order to spend the rest of the day trying to make them understand how retarded they are.
2. That despite working and living in Denmark, I don't fart money. Every time I get home there is someone who tells me that I am sort of a billionaire because I work in a rich country. First of all, I work and live in Denmark and living in Denmark is very costly; I didn't come here to starve in order to buy an apartment in Romania in 5 years. Don't get me wrong, it's not that I criticise people who do this, God knows my heart breaks in tiny little pieces when I think of all the Romanians who make huge sacrifices for a better life. It's just that I am living my life and living your life in Denmark costs almost all your salary. Moreover, I find it hard to say if any Dane that I know is rich. The way I see it, they are all middle class. Low or high middle class, still middle class.
3. High taxes. I am not going to go deep into this, I will say only this: In Denmark taxes are around 35%, in Romania they are more than 40%, what differs is the way this money gets to the state. In Denmark it says clearly on the salary slip what was the total income and how much of it goes to taxes, in Romania you just get your money in your hands; I am guessing everyone is informed enough to know that the employer gives 40% of your salary to taxes. Buuuuut - a second grader might ask, in Denmark you pay hundreds of euros for taxes, while in Romania you pay maybe less than 100 euros. Don't worry, second-grader, you will learn about a magic thing called "percentage" later on, just pay attention to classes so you will not become a moron adult!!!
4. High prices. Well. The same, percentage. High salary, high prices, not a hard thing to learn, yet essential.
5. Taking a year off after high school.
Not only is taking a year off after you finish high school an extremely difficult task due to few jobs available, but it's somehow also morally unacceptable. Your undergraduate program is regarded as some sort of an extension to your high school: if you are going to do it, you will do it right after, otherwise it must be something off about you.
6. Changing education. While in some countries is, to some extent, normal to change your education programme if not satisfied with it, in Romania I felt I was excluded from everything the moment I dropped law school. Every time I tell to someone my story, they become all judgemental. What?!?! You're 23 and you still haven't got your Bachelor degree?! Most of us have already finished our Master's, this is unacceptable, how could you have worked for 2 years instead of finishing your education? ! And they immediately assume I am retarded and unable to finish my studies anyways. Well, forgive me if at 23 I can entirely support myself, I am independent, while you are still sucking money out of your parents waiting for some kind of divine intervention to give you a job! And forgive me if you'll end up a kitchen chef with a graduate degree for the rest of your life while I chose to be chef for a couple of years in order to give myself a chance to think it through and thus a chance for a better future.
7. What's the point in being one of the richest countries in the world if the people don't have money to buy a car and they have no other choice than riding a bike?
In Romania you ride a bike if you live in a god-forsaken village and you have lived during at least one world war. Or if you are underage. But it's almost a shame not to own a car as an adult, you buy a fancy car and only then you move out of your parents home. Sometimes the poor parents buy the car themselves so you get the fuck out of their house.
1. Roundabouts. I find roundabouts to be the most elegant mean of intersection (except those little annoying extremely crowded ones, like you can find in Piatra-neamt). If I am to drive 350 km like I did today, I need to constantly remember myself not to look only on my left side while entering the round-about, but also the right side, for idiots. So, imagine I am to give my driving licence exam right now and I get the funny hard as hell question - Who has priority in a roundabout? A. Cars who already are in the roundabout - which basically mean they come from your left side. B. Cars coming from the right side. C. Cars who already are in the roundabout plus morons coming from your right side, who will curse you for daring to not stop in the middle of the freaking intersection to let them cross. Even if you are in the middle of the roundabout, you still need to take extra caution. At least if you want to catch the plane. Otherwise, you can just let them bump into you in order to spend the rest of the day trying to make them understand how retarded they are.
2. That despite working and living in Denmark, I don't fart money. Every time I get home there is someone who tells me that I am sort of a billionaire because I work in a rich country. First of all, I work and live in Denmark and living in Denmark is very costly; I didn't come here to starve in order to buy an apartment in Romania in 5 years. Don't get me wrong, it's not that I criticise people who do this, God knows my heart breaks in tiny little pieces when I think of all the Romanians who make huge sacrifices for a better life. It's just that I am living my life and living your life in Denmark costs almost all your salary. Moreover, I find it hard to say if any Dane that I know is rich. The way I see it, they are all middle class. Low or high middle class, still middle class.
3. High taxes. I am not going to go deep into this, I will say only this: In Denmark taxes are around 35%, in Romania they are more than 40%, what differs is the way this money gets to the state. In Denmark it says clearly on the salary slip what was the total income and how much of it goes to taxes, in Romania you just get your money in your hands; I am guessing everyone is informed enough to know that the employer gives 40% of your salary to taxes. Buuuuut - a second grader might ask, in Denmark you pay hundreds of euros for taxes, while in Romania you pay maybe less than 100 euros. Don't worry, second-grader, you will learn about a magic thing called "percentage" later on, just pay attention to classes so you will not become a moron adult!!!
4. High prices. Well. The same, percentage. High salary, high prices, not a hard thing to learn, yet essential.
5. Taking a year off after high school.
Not only is taking a year off after you finish high school an extremely difficult task due to few jobs available, but it's somehow also morally unacceptable. Your undergraduate program is regarded as some sort of an extension to your high school: if you are going to do it, you will do it right after, otherwise it must be something off about you.
6. Changing education. While in some countries is, to some extent, normal to change your education programme if not satisfied with it, in Romania I felt I was excluded from everything the moment I dropped law school. Every time I tell to someone my story, they become all judgemental. What?!?! You're 23 and you still haven't got your Bachelor degree?! Most of us have already finished our Master's, this is unacceptable, how could you have worked for 2 years instead of finishing your education? ! And they immediately assume I am retarded and unable to finish my studies anyways. Well, forgive me if at 23 I can entirely support myself, I am independent, while you are still sucking money out of your parents waiting for some kind of divine intervention to give you a job! And forgive me if you'll end up a kitchen chef with a graduate degree for the rest of your life while I chose to be chef for a couple of years in order to give myself a chance to think it through and thus a chance for a better future.
7. What's the point in being one of the richest countries in the world if the people don't have money to buy a car and they have no other choice than riding a bike?
In Romania you ride a bike if you live in a god-forsaken village and you have lived during at least one world war. Or if you are underage. But it's almost a shame not to own a car as an adult, you buy a fancy car and only then you move out of your parents home. Sometimes the poor parents buy the car themselves so you get the fuck out of their house.
I learned how to bike when I was 5, probably because of my father's intense desire to have a boy, but otherwise I think half of Romanian girls my age don't know how to bike. When I was little, there were many rumors about biking: that biking is only for boys and girls should choose roller skates; One of the most outrageous rumor I heard is that if you use a bicycle for a long time you will lose your virginity. Seriously, as primitive as it may sound, girls were really preoccupied by this and it was the same thing about sports; There were not few the times I was warned to be careful how much I stretch during my martial arts trainings. If I want a decent man to marry me later on. Primitive!!!
8. Not getting married.
Well, of course we understand times have changed - middle age people will tell you - and now you need to experience more before tying the knot, but for how many years are you guys going to live like this? One, two, three? At some point you will have to get married.
9. Gay people. I would rather not make any comments on this one, but I just can't help myself: well, we make more kids than we can afford, like 10 and they simply live a miserable life; if we do not want to grow those "extra-kids", we're just going to abort them like they were not even human beings; we drink way too much, smoke way too much; we beat the shit out of our wives and we fuck out secretaries; we are almost never there for our children and on the rare ocassions we are there, we insult them and treat them as little pieces of shit. I made you, I can do whatever I want with you, right? We - straight people - are dragging the holy notion of marriage in deep shit, yet when two people want to get together and even give a chance to a better life to one of those innocent kids we made and abandoned, we throw mud at them. Don't ever ask me my opinion on gay marriages, you might wake up the beast, I believe people should have the right to do whatever they want as long as they don't disturb in any way others.
10. Organic food.
Well, eggs are eggs, cheese is cheese, apples are apples; I think it's stupid you spend more money to buy organic food since food is just food. The people who will tell you this are usually those who spent half of their salaries on cigars and the other half on alcohol.
Well, of course we understand times have changed - middle age people will tell you - and now you need to experience more before tying the knot, but for how many years are you guys going to live like this? One, two, three? At some point you will have to get married.
9. Gay people. I would rather not make any comments on this one, but I just can't help myself: well, we make more kids than we can afford, like 10 and they simply live a miserable life; if we do not want to grow those "extra-kids", we're just going to abort them like they were not even human beings; we drink way too much, smoke way too much; we beat the shit out of our wives and we fuck out secretaries; we are almost never there for our children and on the rare ocassions we are there, we insult them and treat them as little pieces of shit. I made you, I can do whatever I want with you, right? We - straight people - are dragging the holy notion of marriage in deep shit, yet when two people want to get together and even give a chance to a better life to one of those innocent kids we made and abandoned, we throw mud at them. Don't ever ask me my opinion on gay marriages, you might wake up the beast, I believe people should have the right to do whatever they want as long as they don't disturb in any way others.
10. Organic food.
Well, eggs are eggs, cheese is cheese, apples are apples; I think it's stupid you spend more money to buy organic food since food is just food. The people who will tell you this are usually those who spent half of their salaries on cigars and the other half on alcohol.
That's enough for this post; I don't have any other things in my mind right now, but I am sure more will come up at some point.:-)
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